[V]Blog

Since May 21, 2006

Wife 1.0

Posted by Vincent on May 24, 2006

Dear Tech Support:

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife
1.0. I soon noticed that the new program began
unexpected child processing that took up a lot of
space and valuable resources.

In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all
other programs and now monitors all other system
activity. Applications such as Poker Night 10.3,
Football 5.0 , Hunting and Fishing 7.5 , and
Racing 3.6.

I can’t seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background
while attempting to run my favorite applications.
I’m thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0,
but the uninstall doesn’t work on Wife 1.0. Please
help!

Thanks,
Troubled User…..

——————————————————————-

REPLY:
Dear Troubled User:

This is a very common problem that men complain about.

Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife
1.0, thinking that it is just a Utilities and
Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING
SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run
EVERYTHING!!! It is also impossible to delete Wife
1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0. It is
impossible to uninstall, or purge the program
files from the system once installed.

You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife
1.0 is designed to not allow this. Look in your
Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings-Alimony/Child
Support. I recommend that you keep Wife 1.0 and
work on improving the situation. I suggest
installing the background application “Yes Dear”
to alleviate software augmentation.

The best course of action is to enter the command
C:APOLOGIZE! Because ultimately you will have to
give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will
return to normal anyway.

Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be
very high maintenance. Wife 1.0 comes with several
support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0,
Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2.

However, be very careful how you use these
programs. Improper use will cause the system to
launch the program Nag Nag 9.5. Once this happens,
the only way to improve the performance of Wife
1.0 is to purchase additional software. I
recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0!

WARNING!!! DO NOT, under any circumstances,
install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3 . This
application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will
cause irreversible damage to the operating system!

Best of luck,

Tech Support
—————————————————————-

-Vincent

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2 Responses to “Wife 1.0”

  1. meiyean said

    lolz! wife and girlfriend? wtFish

  2. sandeee said

    LOL
    toro u funny ehh hahahahahaaa
    humerous
    nice 1 lol

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